A MEDICS & MENTAL HEALTH TRUTH

 

Dr Zak Patel is a medical professional currently practicing at a correctional services facility, who will soon be releasing a true-life book about the stresses of his time as a junior doctor. Dr Keli Hariparsad is the current CEO of KREST Publishers, who had much of the same experience during her time in the medical world. On World Mental Health Day, the two resilient writers would like to share a note about mental health in the world of medicine:

The last time I wrote with the name Dr K. Hariparsad was on the 30th of October 2019, the day I walked out of the hospital I worked at, knowing I would never return after a brush with lapsing mental health. 

It's a story I don't speak about often. I carry it with undue embarrassment, unnecessarily denying the world the true tale of the events that spurred my departure from an 8-year-long rendezvous with the medical field. I've let a new story naturally unfold in its place, quilted from the assumptions that people made: that I was an inspired soul who switched careers on the whim of bravery. That's only half the story. I was forced to acknowledge the truth of the other - messier - half when a manuscript from Dr Zak Patel landed on my desk. A manuscript that confronted its own sombre backstory in a way that I've never been able to. Until now. 

The year 2019 started on the same stressful note that would be carried throughout. First thing in the early hours of the morning - on New Year's Day - came the hours long resuscitation of a woman, who eventually passed on, and the sickening experience of confronting a family with the truth that we would all be starting the new year with insurmountable grief. My life had been much the same for the previous year as well. Working hundreds of hours in a month, back to back extreme call shifts, running on maximum adrenaline and also zero hospital resources to save the lives of the people I had been employed to do. It was a sustained exhausting effort. As spent as I was, there was always a reason I had to keep being pushed to alarming capacity - the hospital was short staffed, the wards were overcrowded, there was a backlog of referral patients. It was a humanly impossible task to be the bit of prestik holding the entire collapsing health care system together. And before I knew it, I was stretched too thin to be of use to anyone else or even myself. I was diagnosed with burnout syndrome a few months into the year. But - as expected - there were a million and one reasons the department couldn't spare another doctor. I continued to work exhaustively and relentlessly to fix this problem that was, essentially, a Department of Health dilemma. And in the manner of a swimmer fighting their way upstream, I grew too spent to beat against the current anymore. A diagnosis of severe burnout with clinical anxiety followed, and I was finally able to get time off work. It's a pity that it had to reach that point for me to get the first bit of help in the process - acknowledgement of the genuineness of mental health concerns. Because by this time I was seeing a clinical psychologist for generalized anxiety, was on the verge of being started on pharmaceutical treatment (I will address why I refused this, in a bit), and had lost all spark for my career. I placed my resignation from the hospital in early September 2019, but - as you guessed it - was only able to leave at the end of October, thanks to the department needing to wring out every last bit from a medic before they lost another one. 

It took a few more months of rest, talk, and help to find my zest for life again, which came in the form of starting KREST Publishers. The anxiety bowed out at some point, after violently wrestling with it. It was like the inevitable visit of an old rival when I picked up Dr Zak Patel's manuscript. Dr Patel wrote a diary-style book (called Dr Anxiety) about his own time as a junior doctor. He hits the nail on the head about how the field induces a stress so insidious that one never sees it coming. He accurately captures the grapple between the decision to start medication or not - it's a complex decision that involves other people and preconceived perceptions. In fact, I do think my refusal to start any pharmaceutical treatment had to do with all the above.

Zak had the following to say about his candidly-titled upcoming book: 

"Growing up in a generally conservative household with traditional values, mental health conditions were mostly treated as distant and taboo topics not to be discussed in civilized conversation. It was not so much that such sufferers were considered abhorrent, but rather that many ailments of the mind were considered deficiencies of the soul that required more cognizant prayer (and not medication that corrected neurological imbalances). The fact that most of my upbringing was sheltered meant I never had to deal with any major stressors until I started living independently as a student and intern doctor. I had been an anxious child growing up, with features of Separation Anxiety which evolved into a Generalized Anxiety over time. The crime situation in South Africa was quite palpable living in the CBD, which only compounded as I grew older. Each experience of criminality and trauma that affected myself, family, or friends seemed like more proof that the world was a dangerous place where no one would have mercy on another unless they had something to gain. It took a long time to abandon this futile (and exhausting) manner of thinking, which I could only have achieved with the correct management of medication, counselling, spiritual care, and great support structures. I am so grateful to all those who have helped me get to this point and even more so for my own resilience in confronting reality without feeling powerless or overwhelmed."

KREST Publishers could not be prouder to be part of the Dr Anxiety publishing journey. It will undoubtedly become an important book in the honest shedding of light on issues of mental health and medics. For the two will inevitably meet up at some point.

What I personally admire most about Dr Anxiety is the honesty with which it is written. There are no self-conscious qualms about Patel's own story. I hope the book serves as an inspiration to all the brave and overwhelmed medics out there, just as it served as an inspiration to me. 

So in truth, the story of how I came to found KREST Publishers is two-fold. It was written out of the ashes of a disappointing ending, just as much as it was from a new beginning of limitless inspiration.

The Dr Anxiety book is currently in editorial phase. We aim for release later this year.

Dr Zak Patel and KREST Publishers wish the world strength, resilience, and well-deserved rest on this World Mental Health Day. 

www.krestpublishers.co.za

info@krestpublishers.co.za